Let’s say you see an attractive lady or gent at a pub on the weekend. Perhaps you even have a conversation with them. But for whatever reason, either you or the other person takes off before you can establish that you’re interested, and exchange contact info.
What would *you* do in that circumstance?
I’ve been focusing on Missed Connections posts as a response to this sort of situation. But, of course, an individual has other options, too:
- Forget about them and move on.
- Ask around about the person through friends (this works best in the context of someone’s party, rather than a public setting).
- Search for them on Google …??
Through a strange mix-up, I was recently the unintentional recipient of a message based on this sort of situation. Through the wonders of Google searching, the follow message landed in my inbox this weekend:Hi ****;
It’s ******, <occupation>, we met briefly @ ************* on Fri. night before I had to run. So briefly I forgot to ask for your number, but luckily not so that I remembered your name & profession. So googling “**** <her occupation> <city>” led to this email address.
Anyways if you’d like to get together sometime, maybe pizza & not pop? Feel free to email/text/shout.
Cheers, ******.****** *. **********
### ### #### cell
It just so happens that I am friends with the intended recipient of this message (she gave me permission to post the text of the email without names). She seemed a little weirded out that this incident, and wrote to me, “i guess googling strangers is considered the norm and is not creepy anymore? erm. i must be behind the times.”
The odds of someone reading a Missed Connection about themselves would seem to be quite low. Searching for someone’s email online may be more direct, but is it too invasive? Or, perhaps it’s an ingenious tactic, and becoming acceptable in an age when everyone has at least some online presence. I can’t decide.
So, fair readers, I pray thee [so yeah… haven’t had coffee yet]: which is more bizarre (or I suppose, which would you prefer) – to have a Missed Connection written about you, or have someone Google your name + job + city, leading them directly to your email address?
Personally, I’m with the intended recipient of this message – I was definitely taken aback to receive the email (“what?! I wasn’t at ***** on Friday, I swear!”). But I’ve read enough Missed Connections to know they can be pretty bizarro as well. But if everyone gave up on trying to find someone after the fact, or resorted to Google search – well, I’d run out of content for this blog, I suppose. Luckily, that doesn’t seem to be on the precipice of happening any time soon.
EDIT: After a thoughtful reader brought my attention to the overly negative connotations of “stalking,” as opposed to the less loaded term “searching,” I revised this term in the post. Thanks.